If you're single and looking for that special someone, cyber dating is one of the best, most efficient and exciting ways to reach out to the greatest number of compatible people - and then be able to filter the prospects to just a few, or even just one! But many people new to this form of relationship search - and even those with some experience - find themselves frustrated with the process of where to start and how to represent themselves online to a potential friend or lover. Not everybody is Shakespeare, and the thought of having to write an inviting self-portrait or profile can be intimidating, not to mention time-consuming.
Alas, there's no other way around the fact that some research and homework are in order, but the preparatory work can actually be fun and get the juices of inspiration flowing. One of the best ways to start is by visiting a number of online dating sites with different types of profile-builders to help you learn to be specific about how you see yourself and what you want, need and expect from a potential partner. Be sure also to check out some of the online dating site reviews at Kyoopid.com, which can help you determine if a particular site is appropriate to you.
The more legitimate, reputable sites will offer detailed, multiple choice type profile-builders that are relatively quick and painless to get through, although one very popular and pricey site that claims "the most marriages per match" has an exhaustive profile-builder that takes a good three hours to complete. Even with all that, you're not finished without including that inevitable part of your profile where you describe yourself in your own words.
In essence, you have a product to sell. In this case it's you! Your profile, or dating resume as it were, doesn't need to be glowing (or exaggerated to the point of dishonesty) as much as it needs to be compelling to keep your audience - and perhaps future soul mate - reading all the way, maybe even responding. Successful online dating profile writers have learned to use the same techniques that sales and marketing copywriters use to grab and keep customer attention.
A brief headline, for instance, that says something specific and important about the product (you) to garner notice. The following "ad copy"plays upon that headline to highlight your personal uniqueness, what you're passionate about, what you have to share and what the reader might lose out on by not contacting you.
On top of all of it, you have to give your readers some credit for intelligence. Be yourself and write the way you speak, but be sure to go back and read what you wrote before publishing the profile. Then check - double check - for typos, misspelling and grammar errors. Illiteracy and sloppiness are not only red flags as to how you communicate but hugely un-sexy. Be as sincere and truthful as possible, but try to keep your comments up beat, positive and anger- or issues-free. Don't tell too much too soon, especially difficulties or complaints about previous relationships. Whiners are also big turn-offs. Last, but not least, don't forget to post a photo, since profiles with photos get a significantly higher response over those without.
Following these tips will help you produce an online profile that lets the world know immediately who you are, what you're about in life and how serious you are about your search. Just relax, take your time, give it some thought and effort, and before you know it, your email inbox will be filled with appreciative responses.
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2/10/2008
Your Online Personal Ad: Writing To Attract
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Online Dating Guide For Newbies
Learn how online dating can be fun. This article will show you how to take advante of this new experience.
A dating service is not a new idea; they've been around for several decades. What's different about today's dating service is the vehicle they use to connect people to one another.
There was a time when online dating was not looked on as favorably as it is today. In its infancy, online dating was sometimes seen as the only way less desirable people could get a date. That's no longer the case. Online dating is growing rapidly, and is used by people of every age. It crosses all the lines of race, religion, political affiliation and net worth.
Even though you start out in the comfort and safety of your own home, typically the goal of online dating is to find someone you want to meet in the real world. Caution and safety are primary considerations throughout any dating process, but are particularly important where online dating is concerned.
When you begin looking for an online dating service you'll want to look for sites that offer several screening filters to validate identification. This helps determine if the person signing up is really who they say they are.
Browse through several online dating sites before settling on one. If you do a search on Google for online dating sites, there are over 3 million. Don't let that overwhelm you. Just pick a few and spend a few minutes on each one. You can also find review sites that may be helpful in assisting you with your decision. You may want to consider signing up with more than one site.
Be honest when creating your profile. Remember that you're looking for someone to start a relationship with and you certainly don't want to base it on lies and deception. For best results, you'll have to include a picture; uploading several would be even better. Make sure it's a recent one, not one from years ago.
Make sure your personality shines through in your correspondence. It's a little tougher to do online since you don't see facial expressions and hear intonations, but with a little practice and the help of some emoticons and online shorthand, you'll become much better at it very quickly. Of course, if you have a web cam, so much the better.
Don't let your profile paint a boring picture. List your passions, your hobbies, your taste in food, movies, music, authors or artists. You want people to understand who you are and what you're looking for.
You should never be uncomfortable with your dating experience. If a conversation becomes awkward or offensive, get out of it. Most sites will allow you to block members if you choose to. Don't hesitate to use that feature to eliminate unwanted correspondence or contact from a particular member.
There's no need to be upset or feel offended if someone you're interested in doesn't respond. There are way too many people to choose from to let a few no-responses discourage you. Think of them as first dates that didn't work out and move on.
Online dating doesn't have to end in a romantic encounter. Many people just want to keep things casual and remain friends. An online dating service can provide them the opportunity to meet people they would otherwise never have met.
Online dating can be quite effective and fun. Dont be afraid of it!
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2/09/2008
Meeting in Person for the First Time Long Distance Relationship - Success
After spending adequate time chatting with someone, you have finally reached a point that the two of you want to meet. After all, with online dating, this is the goal in the first place so seeing it come to fruition is exciting! Just as you took precautions when first starting out on the dating service, you now need to use a new set of precautions when meeting in person.
1. Always meet in a safe, public location where there are other people around. Make sure a friend or family member knows where you are meeting, the time you are meeting, and the time you will be leaving. If you are not sure how long the meeting will take, use your cell phone to call the friend or family member when you leave so they know you are on your way home. Typically, a restaurant or coffee shop would be the best choices. If you change your plans, always let someone know.
2. Never have the person pick you up in his or her car. Instead, you need to drive your own car so you have the opportunity to leave if you feel uncomfortable or things do not go as planned.
3. Set up the encounter on a day and at a time when YOU are comfortable. Do not feel pushed into meeting at a precise time or place. If the other person insists that you meet where they say and when they say, then cancel the meeting altogether.
4. Do not feel bad if you decide to cancel at the last minute. Too often, people from online dating services are eager to get things going, bypassing the friendship/courtship phase. Just follow your instincts and if the person is not understanding about you changing your mind or becomes angry, then you know it was not meant to be.
5. If you need to fly or drive to another city or state to meet this person, make your own hotel arrangements in a reputable hotel and do not share the information. Rent a car at the airport upon arrival so you can drive yourself to the hotel and to the meeting. Do not agree to meet at the hotel lobby, as the purpose is to have a safe haven should you need it.
To give you an idea of the favorite places to meet, consider the following statistics:
Coffeehouses – 47% meet at a coffeehouse where the atmosphere is relaxed and low-key, inexpensive, and provides the opportunity to talk in a safe environment.
Restaurants – 28% choose to meet at a restaurant, preferably at lunch or early dinner. You want to choose a warm and cozy restaurant that is not too intimate so you both feel at ease.
Bar – 22% meet at a bar to have a few drinks and perhaps dance. While this is not a bad option, it does have disadvantages in that talking is usually difficult because of the music and noise. Additionally, the scene of the bar usually creates too many distractions so you and your date are no focusing fully on each other.
Home – Only 3% meet at home and in reality, this should be 0%! This is never a good option in that you really do not yet know the person.
Parent’s Home – About 1% will meet at the parent’s house but again, even thought the individual seems nice and everything seems to be on the up and up, you do not know this person. Therefore, this too is a bad choice.
Source : http://www.onlinedatingtips.org/
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2/07/2008
Successful Online Dating
1 Specify What You Want
- Decide what kind of dating or relationship you want, define if you are looking for marriage-minded relationship or long-term relationship without any marriage plans; short-term casual dating ranging from few weeks to few months or even intimate encounters for very short-time frames such as days.This step helps you identify what you are looking for.
Why do you have to define what kind of dating or relationship you want? This way you can search for online dating sites based on your decision.There are several sites focusing on marriage minded and long term relationships as well as some that focus on casual, short term and intimate relations.
2 Select Your Dating Site
Browse each online dating site very carefully. Look and read profiles and try to decipher what the other person is searching for. Some online dating sites will allow you to browse profiles without registering first therefore you can can use this opportunity to browse their dating profiles and assess whether that online dating site is your "kind of place".
3 Set Up Your Amazing Profile
This is one of the key steps that a lot of people forget or don’t take the time to properly complete often because they don’t have the time to write a detailed profile; or they think they are not going to be contacting people anyway so why bother; or they think what is the point etc.
Your profile is your first impression to your future/potential partner.When a potential partner is looking through profiles and see an empty profile without a picture you have instantly failed to make an impression. Therefore, a completed profile is a must.
A picture adds another thousand words to your profile. If you wish to remain Anonymous in the beginning a dating profile without a picture then so be it. You can begin by creating your profile details but please have something in your profile other than single lines such as "hot guy looking for a hot girl"; "If you are cute email me"; "sexy girl wants her cute boy friend" or "just looking"!.
4 Using the Dating Site Features
- Not all online dating sites have the same feature set.Depending on whether each dating site charges per month or whether they are free the features offered as part of their program will differ. Most dating sites will allow you to post your profile for free. When you browse their existing profiles and you find a person you like to contact most sites will not let you contact them before you pay a membership fee.
If the site is free then you are allowed to contact or show interest via either a "wink" or an "Instant Messenger" or an internal email via the site.Each of these features will be useful in their own right. A quick and easy method to show your interest is to send a wink or a fixed message on LL. This way you don’t have to come up with your own chat up line or other creative ways of getting attention.ex. The dating site will have predefined messages setup so you just select one wink you like and then voila!! your desired person will receive your wink.
Sometimes it is better to Instant Message a person especially if you find that person rarely comes online and you want to grab their attention. Best of all, an email to the interested party is better because you can describe yourself and create a great first impression.
Emails are the best solution for a number of reasons. For example, if you IM a person and they reject you at that moment because they don’t know much about you some sites may forbid you to contact that same person again - even by email. If the online dating site you signed up is fortunate enough to have chat rooms you can say hi in the chat room and then take the conversation to a private mode for more privacy.
5 Take Your Time To Get To Know
Some people who start dating online rush into things, which they later regret. It is critical that you get to know the other person very well before meeting in person There are several reasons for this. Firstly, your only interaction with this online person has been through Instant Message, Chat, Email or a combination of these.
Sometimes you may have adavanced the relationship to a phone conversation by exchanging numbers. In either of the above mediums the other person can create a make believe scenario, i.e. physical features that might blind you from your normal logical thinking. So it is very important to get to know them from all angles before committing to meet them in person. One of the best ways is to ask open ended questions.
Whatever you do never assume anything about the other person. This is not fair to you because you are not telling yourself the truth and not fair to the other person because you are misjudging them.When you are ready to meet choose a place to where you feel comfortable and safe. Be yourself and enjoy the dating process. Best of all have fun getting to know the other person. If it is not fun then it is not worth your time.
GOOD LUCK!
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